Endless Odyssey


London Towers and Showers

Way back in the innocent, pre-Covid days of 2019, Laura and I planned a student tour of Europe that would trace the path of the American armies during World War II. By February of 2020, we had a group of students and parents who were all set to go, but then: Covid. Reluctantly, we postponed the trip to 2021. Then again in 2021 we pushed the trip back to 2022. And now, by God, we were going to Europe.

And 11/12 travelers were visibly happy at the prospect of finally leaving the country.

As is the way of air travel, some obstacles emerged on our way out of the United States. Storms in Richmond delayed our flight by over an hour, but we ultimately made it to JFK and got to our gate about an hour before takeoff.

This made 66% of travelers happy. 33% were unhappy that the delay getting out of Richmond gave us insufficient time to navigate the slowest McDonald’s in the known world. JFK Airport is the world champion of poor service.

But we had not yet overcome all of the travel obstacles. The plane started to taxi to the runway. Then it taxied away from the runway. Then it sat on the runway, followed by more taxiing.

Disappointingly, all of that taxiing got us no closer to London.

Finally, the pilot announced that there had been a medical emergency and a passenger had been taken off the plane to go to the hospital. That was followed by a mandatory search of all carry-on luggage in that person’s area to make sure that all of their luggage had been sent with them. Then there was some more taxiing. Now, the plane needed more fuel, so we did that. Finally, around midnight, we were on our way to Europe. 7 hours of binge-watching movies and shows and/or broken plane sleep later, we were in London.

Look at all of that room for taxiing.

After a quick stop at the hotel to throw our luggage in an unused basement conference room, we were off.

We fit right in with the average London tube riders.

We got off the Tube in the Westminster area with time to grab a sandwich for a quick lunch in order to keep our scheduled entry time at the Churchill War Rooms. Immediately, we were surrounded by familiar London sights.

A double-decker red bus, Parliament, and Big Ben in the same picture. We win tourist bingo.

But not every landmark was as easy to recognize, and we learned some lessons in London. As one of our travelers observed…

That’s not George Washington. Clive was more about taxing people in colonies without representation than the other way around.

Right around the corner from Not George Washington was the Churchill War Rooms, a museum that preserved the underground area where Winston Churchill and his cabinet planned World War II operations.

It was so great that Nathan almost smiled.

The museum walked us through Churchill’s life, starting with his ministry during World War II, and it took us through the operations and living spaces in the war rooms. Many of the rooms have authentic equipment, documents, and layouts from the Second World War.

Heads up – the people are not authentic.

Wrapping up our tour, were returned to the hotel for dinner. Our hotel was in the Kensington area of London, and after dinner, those travelers not felled by jet lag and spending ten hours on a plane went out to explore the area north of the hotel.

It was the perfect night to see Hyde Park and Kensington Palace.

We ended at the impressive memorial for Albert, the husband of Queen Victoria.

Which earned high marks for actually being operational during our visit, unlike some terrible fountains we could mention.

The next day, the perfect weather of our Kensington tour gave way to the inevitable London rain. We started with a bus tour heading toward Buckingham Palace, and fortunately, the worst of the rain came when we saw Harrod’s and the Ritz Hotel from the safety of the bus. It looked like the rain had trailed off when we got off the bus for the walk to Buckingham Place.

Spoiler alert: the rain had not ended.

By the time we made it to Buckingham Palace, the weather alternated between a steady drizzle and outright rain. But we pushed through and continued to function, not wanting to let people down like some disappointing fountains we may have encountered.

We did get to see some of the preparations for the changing of the guard, although the quick entry of some of the guards caught us off guard.

5 out of 6 travelers were happy with our experience at Buckingham Palace, in spite of the rain.

We returned to our rain-proof transportation just in time for the rain to stop again, this time for good. The weather took a turn for the better as we approached our next destination, St. Paul’s Cathedral.

The last time we visited the cathedral, they had rules against picture-taking. Apparently, wave after wave of rules-challenged tourists armed with smartphones had worn them down. We took full advantage of the more relaxed photography regime by taking many pictures of the awesomeness of St. Paul’s.

While the dome and art of the cathedral get all of the attention, the real draw of the cathedral is the tomb of Admiral Nelson, the victor of Trafalgar. You can’t beat the remains of a leader whose body had only made it back to London from off the coast of Spain because his crew had picked his body in brandy after a French sniper took him out at the end of the battle.

And then, according to legend, they drank the brandy.

Since nothing else in the cathedral could top that, we took the Tube to Tower Hill, to eat lunch and see some of the sights before heading in to tour the Tower of London.

After fortifying ourselves with fish and chips, we were ready to explore the Tower of London.

Joseph was especially ready for the violent history of the Tower.

The Tower complex is like a mini village, with an array of exhibits, ranging from torture devices, a history of armaments, and a history of those famous people who had been imprisoned there. Entering the Tower, we headed straight for the most famous of the exhibits: the Crown Jewels.

Many other tourists seem to have uncovered the closely guarded secret that the jewels were located in the tower as well, and the line to see the jewels stretched through a serpentine and then down past the munitions exhibit.

The line was intimidating, especially since we only had two hours to tour the Tower. A helpful “guard” at the Tower assured us that we would be through the entrance in 20 minutes, and, while we were skeptical, that prediction was remarkably accurate. There were about 20 more minutes of serpentines inside, and 43 minutes after getting in line, we were at the Crown Jewels.

The Crown Jewels, which we could not photograph according to Tower rules, so our travelers would never, ever break the rules by taking a picture of any of the jewels. Ever.

The jewels are an amazing display both of the wealth of the monarchs and of their fortitude in lugging around solid gold scepters for hours on end at official ceremonies. After seeing the jewels, it was time for some of the violence of the Tower of London, at the White Tower.

White Tower has the weapons and armor used over time throughout the tower complex. Most of it was realistic, either replicating what was actually used or what was constructed for show.

Some of it was less realistic…

Like Mecha-Godzilla dragon

And some of it was totally unrealistic.

Seriously, Henry VIII. No one’s buying that.

The White Tower is worth the price of admission to the Tower of London all on its own. After leaving the Tower, we made a quick circuit of the grounds. We had a chance to meet all kinds of folks at the Tower.

As is to be expected, some of the parts of the medieval structures and rooms fell far short of modern American standards.

Like these super-narrow spiral stairs…
And this bed, which has 4,956% fewer pillows than Laura would find sufficient.

At the end of our two hours, we got a few more looks at the Tower Bridge and tower on our way to Covent Garden for dinner.

After dinner, we found another relic from the past.

Hi, I’m trying to reach the 1900’s please.

One of the reasons to travel abroad is to study other cultural views in order to acquire a deeper understanding of your own culture. On our way to Piccadilly Circus after dinner, we found this “American Candy” store, providing a glimpse into the horrifying British perceptions of American lifestyle. And while we may disagree about whether American culture should be so strongly associated with junk food, we can all agree:

The British are objectively incorrect in considering Pop-Tarts, an essential part of the most important at meal of the day, to be a candy. For shame, Britain, for shame.

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